The story of Aiko

View previous topic View next topic Go down

What should i do next for goddesstry?

29% 29% 
[ 2 ]
71% 71% 
[ 5 ]
0% 0% 
[ 0 ]
 
Total Votes : 7

The story of Aiko

Post by zcd123 on Sun Apr 29, 2012 10:59 am

A new world with new things. These new things created a void of chaos and a need to be ruled. Out of this void a spirit came. She had no name and she didn't yet know her power but she would someday be great. The problem was she didn't have a body on the physical plain.
There once was a man named Aito Niigata. He was extremely vain and stuck up to the point that he was confused as to why all women didn't love him. He tried and tried again to find a suitor to marry him but all the women he asked refused. One rainy day Aito had a mischievous idea. He would go and have a wife made for him. He traveled the land looking for the greatest sculptors and he came upon a boy named Akihiko. This boy had creativity,strength,And youth the strong suits of a great sculptor. Aito approached the boy and told him to make a statue of the most beautiful woman in existence to mach his own beauty. The boy agreed but out of spite of Aito's arrogance he made the statue out of a clay that everyday had to be re cured in the sun or it would fall apart.
Aito didn't know what to do with the statue so he tried to use magic to create life. He carves runes of his own blood in the statue and put it in a giant fire. Little did he know only gods can create life. The magic in the statue created another void needing to be filled with a lone spirit. Along came the nameless spirit she read the runes and couldn't help but to touch the statue in its beauty. When she laid fingers on the statue it's magic instantly enveloped her sucking her into the statue. the kiln like bonfire then sealed the runes on the statue and her inside it. Up she rose from the fire a glowing floating goddess of the nonsense of her creation as it was the first of its kind. He took her in his arms and she was confused of his arrogant affection " I name you Aiko," he said purposefully making it so close to his name " And you are my wife,"he continued "I have created you out of nothing and you shall marry me," Aiko was now more confused then ever as she knew this man didn't create her but she was still grateful for her new body that apparently came from him so she decided to accept his offer "I will marry you," she said in a sort of sad tone as she did not want to marry him. They later married and a temple was made for Aiko where people worshipped her. But every night when her clay was moist and soft Aito would beg to touch her but she always refused as she didn't love the man. One night she grew tired of his begging and said " Aito i will never love you or your arrogant attitude," he then grew angry and buried her to deprive her of all light where her physical form eventually broke down and her soul was one again set free to wander for a new host.
A lonely oak nymph wanders and comes across a dying jungle tree. the oak nymph is a priestess of Aiko and she See's the spirit of Aiko grieving at her incompatible dead jungle body. " Great goddess,"she said" No need to grieve... you can... have my body," a truly noble nymph she was Aiko stood and touched the nymph on the forehead and the nymph turned into a giant oak tree. Aiko was happy to have a new body but her true goal was to exude revenge on Aito. She eventually got him into the great oak "Meet me face to face," she said seducing him to the tree. When she saw his face she was so enrages she threw an axe at him that stuck out of his head but instead of blood he bleed golden sap. Her rage had created a horrible curse she turned him into the first birch tree that pours the first fresh waters of the land. A tree exactly like him. No other use than looks and bodily fluids.
avatar
zcd123

Posts : 31
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2012-03-03
Age : 19
Location : MINECRAFTIA

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: The story of Aiko

Post by Bacon_Cakes on Sun Apr 29, 2012 3:23 pm

A new world with new things. These new things created a void of chaos and a need to be ruled. Out of this void a spirit came. She had no name and she didn't yet know her power but she would someday be great.((Just a suggestion instead of 'she would someday be great' perhaps say 'she was destined for great things' or something, I just think it sounds better)) The problem was she didn't have a body on the physical plain. ((It's plane, not plain))
There once was a man named Aito Niigata. He was extremely vain and stuck up to the point that he was confused as to why all women didn't love him.((I think 'baffled' is better wording than is confused)) He tried and tried again to find a suitor to marry him but all the women he asked refused. One rainy day Aito had a mischievous idea. He would go and have a wife made for him. He traveled the land looking for the greatest sculptors and he came upon a boy named Akihiko. This boy had creativity,strength,And youth the strong suits of a great sculptor.((creativity,strength,And youth should be creativity, strength, and youth:))((Strongest suits sounds better than strong I think, though it is correct)) Aito approached the boy and told him to make a statue of the most beautiful woman in existence((existance)) to mach((match)) his own beauty. The boy agreed but out of spite of Aito's arrogance he made the statue out of a ((out of a type/kind of clay)) clay that everyday had to be re cured in the sun or it would fall apart.((that would have to be re-cured in the sun daily or it would fall apart sounds better))
Aito didn't know what to do with the statue so he tried to use magic to create life. ((create life from it)) He carves((carved)) runes of his own blood in the statue and put it in a giant fire. Little did he know((,)) only gods can create life. The magic in the statue created another void needing to be filled with a lone spirit. Along came the nameless spirit((Wink) she read the runes and couldn't help but to touch the statue in its beauty. When she laid fingers on the statue it's magic instantly enveloped her sucking her into the statue. ((The))the kiln((-))like bonfire then sealed the runes on the statue and her inside it. Up she rose from the fire a glowing floating goddess of the nonsense of her creation as it was the first of its kind. He took her in his arms and she was confused of his arrogant affection " ((erase the space here))I name you Aiko," he said((,)) purposefully making it so close to his name "((All dialogue with " doesn't need a space after it. "Aiko- or "I name-)) And you are my wife,"he continued "I have created you out of nothing and you shall marry me," Aiko was now more confused then((than)) ever as she knew this man didn't create her but she was still grateful for her new body that apparently came from him so she decided to accept his offer((.)) "I will marry you," she said in a sort of sad tone as she did not want to marry him. They later married and a temple was made for Aiko where people worshipped her. But every night when her clay was moist and soft Aito would beg to touch her but she always refused as she didn't love the man. One night she grew tired of his begging and said "((erase the space here)) Aito i((I)) will never love you or your arrogant attitude," he then grew angry and buried her to deprive her of all light where her physical form eventually broke down and her soul was one again set free to wander for a new host.
A lonely oak nymph wanders and comes across a dying jungle tree. ((The))the oak nymph is a priestess of Aiko and she ((sees))See's the spirit of Aiko grieving at her incompatible dead jungle body.((I"m a bit confused by the transition. Did Aiko try to inhabit a jungle tree?)) "((erase the space here)) Great goddess,"she said((insert space))"((erase the space here)) No need to grieve... you can... have my body," a truly noble nymph she was((,)) Aiko stood and touched the nymph on the forehead and the nymph turned into a giant oak tree. Aiko was happy to have a new body but her true goal was to exude revenge on Aito. She eventually got him into the great oak "Meet me face to face," she said seducing him to the tree.((I'm a bit confused by this transition also. Did she try to convince Aito to visit the oak that is now the nymph? Or is the Aiko-in-nymph body seducing him elsewhere?)) When she saw his face she was so enrages she threw an axe at him that stuck out of his head but instead of blood he bleed((bled)) golden sap. Her rage had created a horrible curse((Wink) she turned him into the first birch tree that pours the first fresh waters of the land. A tree exactly like him. No other use than looks and bodily fluids.

Bacon_Cakes

Posts : 6
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2012-03-13

View user profile

Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum